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Week 7: No Crying During Fireworks Shows, Winning as a Team, and Nerding Out on Running Data

Welcome back!

It was a grand weekend of family and end-of-summer traditions. There were waterparks, there were bounce houses, and there were slip-n-slides. There was BBQ, fireworks, and parachuters carrying an American flag that got reported as a UFO. There was a fancy hotel room, a Labor Day parade, time with old friends, and finally there was Dinosaur World.

Veni, vidi, vici indeed.

Philosophical Dad Stuff

It was 9:00pm on the button Monday night when my oldest yelled at Popsy (grandfather on my wife’s side). I know this because it was right when the Labor Day fireworks started in explosive fashion. Feeling a bit tired of the entitled attitude of a 5-year-old, I picked him up and stalked off to have a little father-son chat.

I told him how I thought it was absolute trash in the way that he treated people who do nothing but bend over backwards to help give him great experiences. I told him if he got an attitude anymore that night we are leaving immediately, and I told him to get back over to the picnic blanket and sit his little butt down.

When we got back to the group, he moped around for a few seconds before climbing into my lap to watch the fireworks show.

As a big flash illuminated the entire valley, I saw tears streaming down his face.

And I lost all interest in the stupid fireworks. I saw the ghost of my future.

Kids yelling and cursing and slamming doors and throwing things. Missed school days and assignments. Bad influence friends. And those were the tamest of the images that came to mind.

Crazy stuff that parents do when we overanalyze every little decision and conversation we have and make.

I considered if I’d been too harsh, or perhaps not stern enough in the past that we got to this point.

Or maybe it’s because he’d been up way past his bedtime all weekend and was out of patience just like adults are sometimes.

Then again, I’m not here to be his friend, I’m here to be his father.

As I sighed, forgave myself and stretched around to kiss his head, I saw his eyes were closed.

He was so tired, he’d fallen asleep during a fireworks show.

Life is funny. So it goes.

Leadership

The best part of being a leader is seeing your people win.

This past month, my team put up some big numbers at work. They put in the time and the effort and rose to the occasion. And they’re getting rewarded for their efforts, which is gratifying on another level. Furthermore, I’ve got a couple sales reps that may be up for end-of-year accolades and trips if we can figure out how to close the year strong.

There are many times when I question aspects of leadership. Why I did something? Why I said something? Why I reacted a certain way?

But one thing I’ve also learned is to celebrate the small wins, so here I am, patting myself on the back.

It’s easy to feel good when things are going well, but the truth is success is only rented and never owned.

And rent is due all over again.

Couch to Ultramarathon

After nearly two months of building a cardio base doing almost entirely zone 2 heart rate training, I’ve got some interesting data to show progress.

One of the best overall indicators of cardiorespiratory fitness is your VO2 max, or the amount of oxygen you can convert to energy during exercise. When I first started this in late June, my measurement was 33.3, which is below average in the 25-50th percentile and less-than ideal for ultrarunning.

NOT GOOD BOB.

But in the two months since, it’s increased to 44, a gain of almost 33%.

So there’s been a lot of encouraging progress. But today I woke up anxious for the first time about these 50k races in the winter.

A little fear is good for us however.

Used correctly, it can help us focus our best efforts and abilities when we need them the most. And it can sustain us in keeping up intense effort and dedication for months on end.

There’s a big difference between eustress and distress. Distress causes us undue anxiety, spiking our cortisol in negative ways and initiating flight-or-flight responses that don’t solve anything.

Eustress, on the other hand, is what leads us to grow beyond ourselves; stretching into the person that succeeds where we’ve previously faltered.

So my closing thought tonight is to find something that scares the heck out of you.

And then go after it like your life depends on it.

Because it just might.

“Life ought to be a struggle of desire towards adventures whose nobility will fertilize the soul.” Rebecca West

Live triumphantly. See you next week.